Tithing, What's In It For Me

It has been a long time since my last post, not because I did not know what I wanted write, but because there has been so much going on in my world I frankly have not had the time to sit down and just write.

 I have always found it a little strange when retired people say their lives are busier now than when they were working.  Well I can relate.  With all the free time, I have been doing all the things I had no time for before;  like reclaiming my home and landscaping from Lovell who retired 6 years before I did related to a medical disability.  Yes just think about that for a minute. LOL

Well enough with the excuses, the subject I’m going to write about is tithing.  Yes that age old problem of too many people wanting their hands in my wallet.  Especially at church when there seems to be so much need not only by the church its self, but by other ministries such as missions, teens and outreaches that you may not know a lot about. 

If you are in church any where you know exactly what I am talking about.  Do I sound a little down on giving, will think again.  Giving and tithing is one of the most important aspects of belonging to the family of God, short of your relationship with Jesus Christ.  If you do not tithe you are missing one of the biggest blessings from heaven you can ever imagine.

      No!  Pastor Daniel has not enlisted my help in asking for tithes, but I being a lay person can say things in my  
      blog  that pastors might find hard to say in a sermon.

      Listen folks I speak from experience and that is one thing that can not be refuted.  You probably think your
     about to hear another sermon on giving and maybe to a certain extent you are, but this may be the most important
     story I have written to date.  This concerns everybody living in the kingdom of God not just a few.

In Malachi 3: 7-12  Scripture states:  

Return to me, and I will return to you,” says the LORD Almighty.  ⁸ “Will a mere mortal rob God?  Yet you rob me. “But you ask, ‘How are we robbing you?’  “In tithes and offerings. ⁹ You are under a curse —your whole nation (or family in today’s language) —because you are robbing me. ¹⁰ Bring the whole tithe into the storehouse, that there may be food in my house (or money to support the church in today’s language).

And here is the kicker:

“Test me in this,” says the LORD Almighty, “and see if I will not throw open the floodgates of heaven and pour out so much blessing that there will not be room enough to store it. ¹¹ I will prevent pests from devouring your crops, and the vines in your fields will not drop their fruit before it is ripe,” says the Lord Almighty. ¹² “Then all the nations (people, in our language today) will call you blessed, for yours will be a delightful land, (home, in our language today)” says the LORD Almighty.


This scripture was brought home to me November 19, 1981 when Charles and Frances Hunter otherwise known as the Happy Hunters came to Community Church for a time of ministry.  I had given my life to Jesus approximately four years prior so I was a new Christian.


Lovell and I had just built our home in Mauriceville and money was tight, not to mention the economics of the land was not in our favor.  I remember sitting in the kid’s swing Lovell had strung up in a tall sweet gum tree in our front yard, crying out to God for help. 


If only I had $10,000 dollars, I told God, we would be debt free and I could breathe.  Now don’t laugh, that was a large amount of money in 1981.  I was a stay at home mom and it took all our weekly resources to meet our obligations. 


Sunday night I went to church to hear the Happy Hunters, I knew who they were because I saw them on PTL and knew about their ministry of humor.  At the end of the sermon they spoke about tithes and giving and referenced the above scripture.  They said that was the only instance in the Bible where the Lord said, “test me and prove me”. 


As I said money was tight but I had a $20.00 bill in my purse, I pulled it out and said to God,” I trust your Word Lord”, make it happen, well so to speak.  I left there excited about what God was going to do along with some apprehension as well.


A short time later Lovell said we needed to start tithing to the church, oh; we gave from time to time a few dollars in the offering when I had a little extra, which was not very often. I thought how am I going to tithe when I can only pay my bills.  How many of you have said those exact words.  Oh ye of little faith. 

 Well he was adamant and I complied.  He still says to this day he does not know how I did it, but the money was always there.  Okay, I had to juggle a little but God always provided.


Back to the story:


I can tell you money did not fall from heaven as a result of the $20.00 or the tithing we began, but a short time later Lovell was appointed to a new job making more money without rainouts (he was a construction electrician). And, a car was furnished with all the gas needed.  Did I mention the car was available for us to use as we needed for our family as well. 


Our kids were never sick at least with illnesses that would have been costly, and the bills were paid with extra in the bank.  Wow God was so good, but because God knew the future he began to make further provision for our family.  He had to prepare me for a huge change in my life. 


Lovell lost the job four years later due to a change in the IBEW local politics.  He picked up a job here and there, but soon had to travel to find regular work.  God had begun speaking to me about going to college; I just wanted a career that would keep this from happening again. (That story is in my blog titled, “My Angel”).


I was devastated to be left at home with teenage kids while he worked in New York. He was only able to come home once every six weeks.  During that time we prayed for a job at home but none was available. 


About a year later Lovell found work at home but with a cut in pay.  I was still in school and not ready to graduate for about a year and a half.  I knew when I graduated our lives would be different because RN’s had no problem finding work at any hospital anywhere.  The hospitals were even competing with sign up bonuses.   I kept my nose to the grind stone and graduated May of 1989.


After graduation I signed with Baptist Hospital-Orange because it was close to home.  From that time on God has blessed us in ways I would have never imagined.  You see Lovell and I both came from very poor families and never dreamed we would succeed as we have.


God not only blessed us financially, but blessed our children financially as well.  They are both Christians, married to Christian spouses.  God is so good I can not imagine living my life without him. 


God does not float money from heaven to supply our needs albeit he could if he wanted, but he meets your needs for the long term.  Looking back I never would have dreamed the direction our lives have taken.

One morning a few weeks ago as I was spending time with the Lord reading Luke 5^: 1-8 Jesus dropped a little insight into my heart concerning this story.


  Jesus was standing by a lake and suddenly people began to crowd around him listening to what he was saying.  He used one of the boats at the water’s edge to push off a little bit from the shore.  Your voice carries on the water and that was his microphone. 
When he finished speaking he said to Simon,” go out into the deep water and let your nets down for a catch”. 

Simon was reluctant because he and his friends had fished all night and did not catch a thing, but because Jesus said so, they let down their nets.  
The fish they caught was such a large number that their nets began to break and they had to signal for their friends to come help.  Simon and all his friends were astonished at the catch of fish.


Jesus dropped this message into my heart; you see Jackie the principle of giving is in this story. I needed a boat; Simon had a boat and allowed me to use it.  When I finished with the boat I gave back to Simon even more than he ever expected, if he expected anything at all.


Scripture states in Luke 6:38:


6 “Give and it will be given back to you, a good measure, pressed down, shaken together and running over will be poured into your lap.  For with the measure you use it will be measured to you”. 


You see if you give a little you get a little.  So give happily knowing you can’t out give God. 

If you think about this principle of God’s Word it also works in the secular world.  Consider Bill Gates, he has given millions of dollars to charity and God just keeps on giving back to him.  If he can trust you with the blessings he will continue to pour them out.  It is a principle of God’s word.


Well then tithing, what is in it for me? Just about everything, blessings I find hard to contain.  Never doubt God, never, never, never.  He is just waiting to bless you too. 

Jackie

When It All Began

3-15-12

As I have said before we all have stories to tell and we are the only one’s that can tell them.  It is my hope that some of you reading these stories began to think about your stories and put them on paper, if not for a blog for your own self and your grandchildren and their children.

I grew up in the church beginning as a small child when my grandparents picked me up on Sunday morning.  We drove to a very small Nazarene Church tucked in the woods of a north Louisiana town called Robeline.  This small town is sandwiched between two other towns that might be more recognizable called Natchitoches and Many LA.


I always enjoyed telling people where I'm from because Natchitoches is where those famous Christmas lights are displayed all along the river, and where the movie “Steele Magnolias” was filmed. It is a beautiful and quaint small city with rich history.

My family moved away from Robeline and to Orange, Texas when I was in the fourth grade. My dad was employed at The American Bridge Division Steele yard and we settled in one of the homes in Riverside. I loved living in Riverside there were so many kids to play with, and it was especially fun on Halloween because the candy we collected would last for weeks.

 (I’m not a proponent of Halloween as it is celebrated then or today. Back then I didn’t know what I know now).

My dad did not go to church, my mom only went occasionally. Somehow I found myself in a little Pentecostal church on  14^th Street in Orange.  Pastor Stevens was the pastor there and I loved it.  I was not really into all the dos and don’t s of the Pentecostal Church I just liked being back in church fellow shipping with the kids.   

I remember on one occasion I was in Houston with this group of young people at a youth revival. We left the church in a car to go back to where we were staying, we crossed an unmarked railroad track and a train came roaring by and missed us by only a very few feet. It was such a close call I will never forget that moment when I was almost called into eternity.

I can tell you God had a plan for me all along and protected me even then. I know I site this scripture a lot but it is so true and one of my favorites.

In Jeremiah 29:11 scripture states:
11“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”  God is so good.

I was about 13 years old and my family moved to a larger home in Riverside. I was the oldest of 3 kids with another on the way. Did I mention we moved across the sidewalk from Lovell and his family? OMG it was love at first site. I could not take my eyes off him, he was so good looking, but he did not know how I felt after all, he called me a “snotty nosed kid”.  I was not deterred, I always stayed up at night to watch him walk into the house after he had been out with friends.  

A short time later when I was 15 the Nazarene Church on 10^th and Cherry was where I was calling home. I loved going to that church as well because the folks there were so loving and accepting of me. I found solid relationships there that lasted through high school. I still keep in touch with some of those guys through Facebook.

All through high school my feelings for Lovell did not change, but he did not know how I felt. My mom and dad began to have problems that lead to a divorce and we moved away to another place in Orange. When I graduated high school I asked him to take me to my graduation and party. He was nice and accepted. We did not date anymore after that until we saw each other at Zack's Hamburger. You remember the place where all the kids met and circled and circled until we found a parking place and with someone we wanted to talk.

I guess he saw something in me that night he had not noticed before and asked me to a New Year's dance at the DERA.  We dated 6 months and he asked me to marry him. Oh happy days my dreams had come true.  I was 18 and he was 21 when we married.

Now getting back to the story:
Lovell and I had been married a number of years and decided to take a road trip out west.  Tim our son was 8 and Erica our daughter was 4.  I started reading some books written about the ancient astronauts and that was the door that opened me up to the occult. 

I knew nothing of the occult, oh I knew there was a Devil and Hell but didn’t realize the implications of opening myself up to what is a very real and evil spirit world.  I was fascinated with the stories of demonic possession and people that spoke to the spirit world.  The more I read the more I was hooked. 

The entire trip I had a book in my hand reading something that pertained to that subject.  The reading continued even after we came home, not quite as much but enough to keep me interested. 

Lovell’s work caused him to have to leave home early to get there on time. 
I began watching television waiting for time to get Tim up for school; I was searching the stations which didn’t take long seeing as we only had 3 to search and I landed on PTL with Jim and Tammy Faye Baker.  I watched because I liked the music and the conversion.  And, there was nothing else on at that time.

 I continued to watch for a few weeks and thought Tammy Faye Baker was really weird the way she made herself up, but I could tell she loved the LORD.

One morning after Lovell left for work I turned the television on for my usual morning session with the Bakers, and as I sat there I began to feel afraid.  I had never felt afraid before sitting in the living room.

I began to feel a presence in the room a dark feeling like something was going to happen. The fear was almost over whelming for this young mom in the house alone with her 2 small kids.

I didn’t know what was going on but I knew enough about GOD to know I could call on him and he would listen.  Somehow I knew I had to ask for forgiveness of my sins and plead to him for help.  I did just that and at that moment Jesus came into my heart and drove out the darkness. 

I was concerned and wanted to learn what had happened to me.  The more I watched PTL the more I learned there is a spirit world out there and when I started to read those books I opened myself up to the Devil and the demonic world. 

Scripture states in 1 Peter 5:8

“8 Be alert and of sober mind. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour. “

I had been going to church for most of my life but had not learned a thing about the evil one at least not in that respect.  Say what you will about Jim and Tammy Baker of PTL, but I credit my salvation as an adult to those two ministers.  If the devil can get a hold of Jim and Tammy Faye as he did he can certainly come after me if I do not watch and submit to God. 

I finally got enough courage to tell Lovell about my new found faith; I say courage because we were frequent flyers at The Circle Club, The Texas Pelican, and some local bars in Bridge City.   I wasn’t sure how he was going to take the news.  I told him I didn’t feel good going to those places any more with the friends we had been seeing. Once those friends found out about me we were pretty much done in their circle anyway. 

Scripture states in 1 Corinthians 15:33 - 34

³³ Do not be misled: “Bad company corrupts good character.”^{[b] 34} Come back to your senses as you ought, and stop sinning;  

WOW that pretty much says it all.

We started going back to the Nazarene church where we were married, it was good there and we went together as a family.  Lovell had not yet committed to the LORD but he never once pressured me about the friends we left behind or the clubs. 

One day my sister called me and asked us to go with her to a church on

16^th street called Community Church.  I didn’t really want to go, but I did because she didn’t want to go alone.  Of all things, there was a Monk ministering that morning and I got nothing out of that.  Lovell didn’t go back, but I liked the music and there was something about that church.

The people there were friendly and I returned the next Sunday.  Lovell didn’t mind he just stayed home.   The kids and I walked in alone and sit on the second bench from the front.  I didn’t return to the Nazarene Church,  and began to settle in at Community Church. 

I joined a Tuesday morning bible study taught by Pastor Buck.  I loved hearing Pastor Buck teach.  I was so hungry for the Word; I hadn’t heard it taught like he was teaching. 

After a couple of years Pastor Buck announced he was leaving, and I was devastated.  I knew I would never love another pastor as I loved Pastor Buck. 
Well the job was on to find a new pastor and David Berkheimer came to try out.  Apparently he was receiving direction from God concerning a move from his present church in Rosenberg TX near Houston. 

I still remember the sermon he preached that morning. A few weeks went by and the call was made.  He was coming to Orange, we had a new pastor.  The rest is history; he stepped down as senior pastor July 31, 2011 after 32 years.

Again I was devastated; I sit under his ministry so long I thought nothing would ever be the same, but I vowed to support the new senior pastor.  Pastor David laid the foundation for what Community Church has become today, and Pastor Daniel is picking up the mantle with new vision and direction from GOD for Orange and the surrounding communities.  We the church are blessed to have him and Mary Beth as our leaders.

Well let me get back to the story:

Lovell did not chose to go with the kids and me to Community for a long time but GOD gave me a scripture that kept me strong and allowed him to come in when he was ready.

Scripture states in  1 Peter 3:1

“Wives, in the same way submit yourselves to your own husbands so that, if any of them do not believe the word, they may be won over without words but by the behavior of their wives.”

In other words keep your mouth shut and let GOD do the work.  In approximately 2 years he received salvation and was baptized.  I did not join the church for those years prior because I wanted us to join together as a family.  We have seen many mighty acts of GOD since then and we raised our children on the foundation of GOD’S Word.  Praise GOD they are doing the same.

The essential point of this story was to tell the account of the demonic encounter, and how if we open the door to that world evil will come in and try to devour us.  Always be watchful of what you read, watch on television and get involved with because he can sneak in and you may not even realize he is there until one day something dreadful happens to change the course of your life for the worst.  With Satan comes fear, confusion and disappointment,  And That Does Not Come From GOD.
As I said before God only wants the best for us.  He loves you so much even if you don’t love him.  He’s there waiting for you to call out to him and receive Jesus into your heart.

Jackie

Un-forgiveness / Forgiveness

When I asked God what he wanted me to write about I did not get an answer.  That is not to say there aren’t still lots of topics where I have been an over comer.  I just want to hear from Him, because when the anointing comes the words flow and I find the writing is much easier.  

As I continued to ask for his guidance he began to whisper forgiveness in my ear, and oh yes, I was afraid that was going to happen.  One of the hardest obstacles we as Christians have to hurdle is un-forgiveness and forgiveness, and I’m no different. 

It’s not enough for me to humble myself as I have never humbled myself before, but now God, you want me to tell it on the World Wide Web (www).  You will see what I mean as you read further.

Please remember as you read this I am still a work in progress. I have been called and redeemed by the blood of Jesus, forgiven of my sins because of that blood he shed on the cross, and filled with the Holy Spirit that was sent after Jesus ascended into heaven and sit down at the right hand of the Father.  That is called relationship with Jesus, being changed day by day and year by year from the inside out so as to look more like Him.

I will call the characters in this story by names that are not their own.

Dan Seaborn quotes from an article called, “Can You Ever Forgive Me:”,

“Forgiveness is freeing your spirit, heart and mind. Forgiveness is taking care of you and restoring your relationship with God to wholeness.”
God had a reason when he said in, Ephesians 4:26
²⁶ “In your anger do not sin,^:
Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry.”

He didn’t say I would never get angry just be careful it does not control me or the out come, because issues will build up and become blown totally out of proportion if not dealt with soon.

This is what happened to me.  Lovell and I thought we were doing a good thing for someone we knew, I’ll call Maggie.  Most of her life she lived in substandard housing, in neighborhoods that were less than desirable. These homes and apartments were rotting around her with bug infestations that would be intolerable for any of us.  This was the normal way of life for her. 

In this particular neighborhood danger was becoming evident by the numerous police calls and she was becoming afraid to be at home.  Lovell and I talked the situation over and found it within our means to purchase a nice 3 bedroom home in a safe neighborhood. 

We were able to get the home declared a HUD home and we as the home owners could charge what ever we wanted but HUD would only reimburse a said amount. Lovell and I agreed Maggie would live there rent free only having to pay the utilities.

The home needed some repairs but we were up to the challenge.  That was when we had lots more energy and stamina than we do now.

 We purchased the supplies, climbed on the roof and with the help of Lovell’s brothers replaced it with a new one. Lovell and I repainted the whole interior of the house, replaced the kitchen and dining room tiles, shampooed the carpets and scrubbed every inch of the house that could be scrubbed.  We even let Maggie choose the paint colors.

I was about to get new furniture for my home so I passed my used furniture on to her.  We were so happy for Maggie and I think she was happy too at first.

When moving day arrived Lovell and I were there to move her into the safe, clean and bug free home.

After settling Maggie into her new home we soon began to get phone calls from her complaining about the central air and heating system.  She could never figure out how to use the thermostat to control the temperature even after showing her on numerous occasions. Maggie was never happy with the garage door and its operation, this from a woman who never had a garage or central air or heat. 

 During this time Maggie was grieving over a man I’ll call Don.  She met and fell in love with him, but soon landed back in prison for parole violations, if my memory serves me correctly. Maggie thought only of the day he would return so she and Don could get married.

Various complaints kept coming regarding the house and Lovell and I began to wonder if we had made a mistake.  As good as the idea was to get her out of the neighborhood she was previously in; we did not ask God for his direction.  I think this might be a problem with a lot of of us Christians where problem seem to ensue as a result.

 

Scripture states in Proverbs 3:5-6     ⁵ Trust in the LORD with all your 

heart and lean not on your own understanding;  ⁶ in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your

paths straight.

In other words just because it sounds good and looks good does not always play out for the best.  Submit your plan to the Lord and let Him direct you.  If He says okay and you have peace move forward, but continually bring the venture before Him for guidance and direction.  Obviously from what you are reading we did not consult the Lord about this venture nor did we pray about it along the way. 

How many times does God have to take us around the same block before we get it in our heads to seek him first about decisions we want to make.  Well for me, there have been many times I’m sorry to say.  

Early in the year of 1992 Don was released from prison and moved into the house with her.  He obtained a job and plans were being made for a May wedding.  Maggie finally began to show signs of happiness.

During this time Lovell and I applied to HUD for an increase in the amount of money they were allowing for the home. 

Following approval of the increase a letter was sent to Maggie from HUD indicating the amount HUD was paying to the homeowner (us) for the use of the home was going to increase, and her rent might as well.  Remember earlier I said she was not paying any rent, only utilities. 

Maggie became irate, she came to my job at Baptist Hospital – Orange and wanted to know the meaning of the letter.  She stood in the hallway outside my office, and in a raised voice accused Lovell and me of underhanded attempts to raise the rent because Don was there.  I tried to explain but she did not want to listen or she did not understand the contract.  The increase was what HUD was going to pay us for the use of the home, and we could charge any amount for the rent.

There was no appeasing her and finally I just had to ask her to leave.  She yelled at me until she got on the elevator to leave.  I was mortified and hurt that she would do such a thing after all we had done. 

 A few months later the wedding took place and Lovell and I were invited. The atmosphere was cool to say the least and nothing was said of the past events. 

As time passed the garage door became more of a thorn in her side.  Maggie had it replaced because she backed into it with her car.  She replaced the door at her expense and without our knowledge. She also had a garage door opener installed.

I will skip forward and say she never recovered from her thoughts of Lovell and me trying to take advantage of her.  Even though we never charged any rent or up keep on the home. 

She and her husband found another house and moved out without telling us.  We never knew the reason they moved, but when they left they trashed the house and left trash that we had to haul away. This was the house we purchased for her and worked so hard to make nice for her.

I was angry to say the least.  But more than that, I was hurt and hurt to the very core of my being.  I could not stop crying and thinking about what she did. Her family was angry with me, because I could not let it go and let it smooth over. 

I spoke to our Pastor’s wife Melba Berkheimer about the anger I was experiencing.  Melba was not only a godly woman but also a Licensed Family Counselor.  She told me I had to forgive her, but that was not what I wanted to hear. 

She spoke of the forgiveness God sent his son to provide for me, and yes, yes I knew all that, but it was not an easy pill to swallow.  She told me to write letters to the people involved, and offer my forgiveness for all the things Maggie did. Melba said forgiveness didn’t have anything to do with the way I felt, my forgiveness would free God to take the situation and make all things right again in his timing.  She said the forgiving feelings in my heart would take time. 

I wrote the letters but they were as cold as I was in my heart when I sent them.  The relationship with Maggie did not recover until one day God began speaking with me to go by her house.

It took months of prodding and conviction from God, but one day after church I got in the car and went to see her. Don her husband was back in prison, and she was living the same kind of life as before we intervened.  I asked her to forgive me for my hard heartedness toward her. God began to restore the relationship but it was a slow process. 

A few weeks later she announced she would be having a complete knee replacement. The surgery was done in Lake Charles and after work I went over to check on her. 

Shortly thereafter she was released and sent home.  The knee was healing; she had even begun to walk some. Her family had started other medical testing they felt necessary at the time. It was after one of those tests that she went home and suffered a massive hemorrhagic stroke in which she did not recover.  She died a few days later after the family agreed to remove life support. 

God knew her future and because he loved me and Maggie so much he brought us to a place of reconciliation before she was taken away.  If I had not obeyed His voice and let my pride control me that reconciliation would not have taken place.  I thank Him for that and I know I will see her again someday in Heaven, because she had given her heart to Jesus.

Her family has been estranged from me for the last 20 years because of the events that took place.  About 6 months ago I was praying for the situation as I do from time to time, and God said send another letter.  This time write down what I tell you, and don’t think twice about sending it.  The letter was sent as follows:

10-14-11

Maggie’s family: No name here for obvious reasons:

Sometimes things can be better said in the written word than in person where emotions can rule the situation, and get in the way of what really needs to be said.  So I hope you read this with a heart to listen and hear what is in my heart. 

With as much as I know about Satan I wonder why I allowed him to manipulate me in such a way as to cause a split in our relationships.  I take full responsibility for the things that have upset you and me and caused us grief. 

There may be too much water under the bridge for us to ever achieve the relationship we once had years ago, but I want you to know that’s okay.  God has a way of healing wounds in a way that can never heal on their own, and restore relationships in his own timing.  For me there is no need to rehash the past or revisit the I said she said path. That is what the enemy would like us to do because he is in the blame game.  God is only concerned with forgiveness. 

Maybe God has been speaking to you as well about this subject, if so I hope you will forgive me for the past years I have allowed this to go on.  Un-forgiveness will truly take its toll on a person’s life if it is not dealt with and given to God for healing.  That is what I am doing, so please find it in your heart to forgive me as I lay this burden down and leave it finally at the feet of my Lord once and for all.   It is my prayer that you find as much peace from this as I have. 

To God be the glory.

I hope by telling my story it will help someone to see a little more clearly about un-forgiveness and forgiveness.  If not dealt with soon it will eventually destroy you and the relationships of all involved. 

When you store un-forgiveness or resentment in your heart, it is like a seed that grows whether you are conscience of it or not. At first it starts out as anger, it then turns into resentment and then bitterness.
* Forgiveness can't be based on feelings.  Our feelings change.  Forgiveness, however is an act of obedience. An act of faith....forgiveness is living free of consuming bitterness.  *by Gigi Tchividjian. 
Bitterness that begins to affect your mind and thoughts and how you view and treat others.  Thank God I dealt with that before Maggie died, and I’ve left the other at the feet of Jesus.  God knew!

Jackie

Erica's Story

After many prayers, confrontations and anxious moments Lovell and I finally saw our son Tim and Erica our daughter through their teenage years.  And as many parents can attest I thought if I made it through those years, would I ever like them again?   But as time passed I found I was allowing them back into my good graces. 

I’m sure they were no different than most teens stretching their wings trying to find their way in life.  I just found myself ill-equipped to connect with the designer generation, and all the pressure that came with trying to keep up on a limited income.  But, somehow with the Grace of God and the knowledge we gained from Pastor David Bernheimer’s messages on the gifts of tithing and giving we made it through.

  Lovell looks back and comments about how I was able to make all the payments we had coming in each month with the money that was available to me.  Well it was totally God. 

Malachi 3:9 is my personal favorite scripture because it is a test me and prove me scripture.  I did test it and God proved it.  But this is a whole new story that I may write about in the future.

Scripture states in:

 Malachi 3:9

 “In tithes and offerings, ¹⁰ Bring the whole tithe into the storehouse, that there may be food in my house. Test me in this,” says the LORD Almighty, “and see if I will not throw open the floodgates of heaven and pour out so much blessing that there will not be room enough to store it.

And in:

Luke 6:38 scripture states:

³⁸ Give, and it will be given to you. A good measure, pressed down, shaken together and running over, will be poured into your lap. For with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.”

At that time all three of us Tim, Erica and I were in college. With help through student loans, scholarships, the credit card, and what cash we could muster, we all graduated.  Tim and Erica both worked part time in order to help pay for their education.  I am so very proud of them both.

Before Tim completely finished college he married and settled down with his wife Christi.   A couple of years later we were enjoying our first grandchild, a chubby little boy named Brandon.  Erica’s graduation from college would come later; she was working for a law firm in Beaumont in her degree field.  I began my career at Baptist Hospital- Orange and soon moved over to The Endoscopy Center of Southeast Texas. Life was good, she was preparing to move out when she graduated, and I was looking toward to life again with just Lovell and me.

Erica was and is a beautiful young woman.  While she was working at the law firm in Beaumont she began dating a co-worker I will call John (though not his real name).  Erica had been raised in the church since the age of four and knew God as a child, but as a teenager she was lured away by the excitement of parties, friends and boyfriends. 

John was not a Christian and played music in a local Beaumont band. Erica spent her weekends waiting for him at a nearby table in whatever club he was playing.  This went on for approximately two years.  It’s not that we did not like John we just wanted Erica to eventually come into God’s plan for her and marry a Christian man.

 Lovell and I prayed for John to accept the Lord and allow that relationship with God to change his life.  Erica invited him to church and he came on several occasions, but was never interested enough to say yes to the Lord. 

One morning Lovell and I were praying together as we did every morning before work and God gave me a scripture concerning their relationship.

 Scripture states in:

2 Corinthians 6:14

^“14 Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common?”

 Well, we finally had some prayer direction and began to pray what God said.  Within two weeks they broke up.  

Lovell and I were stunned when she told us, but said nothing of our prayers.  About two weeks later they were seeing each other again.  We did not deter from what we heard God say.  We continued to pray and claim the scripture.  They broke up again a short time later and that was the end.  I’m sure it was hard for Erica, but I believe she came to realize there was a better life than waiting for her man in the clubs.

Not to much time passed and our good friend David Wagner invited us to come to his Ordination for pastor.  Erica came along because she knew the family, and because she and their son were in the youth group together at our church. Erica and Randy had not seen each other for a number of years related to college and work, so naturally a date was made a few days later to catch up on their activities.  They began to date in April and by September they announced their engagement to be married.

We were so happy about that announcement.  We knew Randy and his parents and how they raised him as we raised Erica.  God had answered our prayers. They were married in December on Erica’s birthday.

 Again let me say God is so faithful to hear us when we pray.  Sometime the outcome is not always what we envision, but His plan is always better.

They have been married 13 years and have 2 wonderful little girls.  Erica is a stay at home mom, and they are raising the girls with their same Christian values. 

Erica serves her Lord Jesus wholeheartedly putting Him first, then her husband, and then her children.  Just the way God teaches.  She studies the Word to show herself approved by God, and I am amazed at her wisdom and knowledge of that Word.  She is truly a woman of God.  This mom could not be more proud of a daughter and what God has done in her life.

The road was not always smooth raising Erica through those teenage years, but her dad and I never gave up trusting that God had a plan for her, a plan to give her hope and a future following Him. 

There is a scripture that says, and I will paraphrase, train up a child in the way he should go and he will not depart from it.  There may be parents out there today that are standing in the gap for their children because they have veered away from God, please do not give up on them or God’s plan for them. 

He will only let them go so far and then begin to reel them back. He chases after them until they either say NO, or they run back to the arms that are always open.  Regardless God is always faithful to be there when they call.

A grateful MOM

The Quiet Place

A Quiet Place

Mark 6:31

³¹ Then, because so many people were coming and going that they did not even have a chance to eat, he said to them, “Come with me by yourselves to a quiet place and get some rest.”

“Come away to a quiet place”…………is there such a thing as a quiet place anymore? 

We can all relate to the business in our lives what with our work, families, our music, television, video games, little league games, dance lessons, school, homework and yes even church.

Is there really a quiet place we can go to other than our bed, as we fall into it half unconscious and sleep only to get up and do the same thing again the next day? 

Really, this has been a way of life for me most of my adult life.  I am one of those type A personalities that tries to tuck into the day all the multi-tasking I can.  Have you ever come home from work or school tired and mentally drained, and all you want to do is just lay your head down and close your eyes in a quiet place for just a few minutes. 

Maybe when you get to be my age you can do that, but for some of you young mothers that still have children at home it is just not possible.  Please, I remember, when my kids would get home from school, there was always some kind of practice to go to.  Dinner to prepare, dishes to clean, washing to get done so those all important practice uniforms could be clean for the next day, and oh yes, homework that was quickly becoming over my head, but I didn’t dare let on that I didn’t understand. 

I think in today’s world we as wives, mothers, career women, and those of us who volunteer in some capacity might all find it difficult to eliminate hurry from our lives long enough to go to a quiet place. 

In the book, “The Life You’ve Always Wanted”,  written by John Ortberg, he quotes someone by the name of Carl Jung stating, “hurry is not of the devil, hurry is the devil.” 

Ortberg also writes,  “We seem to be under the illusion that if we hurry it will buy us more time. When in reality it can destroy our souls.  Not that we will renounce our faith but we could become so preoccupied and distracted that we settle for less than what God has for us.  We become less effective for the Kingdom of God.  Even Jesus felt the need to pull away from the crowds of people, for instance when he chose his disciples in”.

Luke 6:12 – 13  

 ¹² One of those days Jesus went out to a mountainside, and spent the night praying to God.

¹³ When morning came, he called his disciples to him and chose twelve of them, whom he also designated, apostles.

Matthew 14:23

²³ After he had dismissed them, he went up on a mountainside by himself to pray.
God wants us to come away by ourselves to a quiet place.  Silence always involves listening.  Just to stop talking without listening to God is not silence.  I am going to give you 4 little moments of silence that fills our day. Moments you might not have even thought about.
 
Consider early morning in bed before you get out of bed. 
One thing I remember a friend saying was before he gets up in the morning he thinks about the Lord’s Prayer.

The 23 Psalm

THE LORD is my Shepherd [to feed, guide, and shield me], I shall not lack.

    ²He makes me lie down in [fresh, tender] green pastures; He leads me beside the still and restful waters.
    ³He refreshes and restores my life (my self); He leads me in the paths of righteousness [uprightness and right standing with Him--not for my earning it, but] for His name's sake.
    ⁴Yes, though I walk through the [deep, sunless] valley of the shadow of death, I will fear or dread no evil, for You are with me; Your rod [to protect] and Your staff [to guide], they comfort me.  ⁵You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies. You anoint my head with ^[a]oil; my [brimming] cup runs over.
    ⁶Surely only goodness, mercy, and unfailing love shall follow me all the days of my life and through the length of my days the house of the Lord [and His presence] shall be my dwelling place.

When you have that first cup of coffee in the morning, invite Jesus to come and sit with you before the day begins.  You probably have not thought about Jesus waiting for you to wake up, and now that you’re awake he wants to spend some time with you.

When you’re stopped at one of those traffic lights that you think will never give you a green light to turn is an opportunity to just say the name of Jesus, it brings such peace.

This is my personal favorite: 
Step outside just before dusk and experience the gift of a beautiful sunset, or just before you go to bed step out and listen to the night.

The Consecrated Place
³ The LORD said to Solomon in

1 Kings 9:3

“I have heard the prayer and plea you have made before me; I have consecrated this temple, which you have built, by putting my Name there forever. My eyes and my heart will always be there.”

In this passage Solomon had finished building the temple of the Lord and the royal palace.  God appeared to him and assured him his eyes and heart would always be there.

In a Wednesday night Bible study we learned how to choose a quiet place to experience the presence of God.  We choose the place and God will consecrate it. “His eyes and his heart will always be there.”  We were taught to anoint our place with oil.

 ⁹ “Take the anointing oil and anoint the tabernacle and everything in it; consecrate it and all its furnishings, and it will be holy. 

(In your case the place you have chosen as your quiet place)

This could be a spare bedroom, the end of your sofa, your dining table, a place to go where you can wait, and listen. To rest in the arms of Peace.  Come to that place with expectation of meeting Him there.  Just sit quietly before the Lord, sometimes talking can block the power of God.  Concentrate on Him and let Him minister to you. 

Can you just imagine choosing your quiet place and anointing it with oil and everything around you there, and then allowing God to consecrate that place.  A place God calls holy “His eyes and his heart will always be there.”

Scripture says,
Psalm 37:7
Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for him.

In  Lamentations 3:25-26
25 “The Lord is good to those whose hope is in Him, to the one who seeks Him; 26 “it is good to wait quietly for the salvation of the Lord.” 
So find a little time in your day and wait for Him and allow the power of the Holy Spirit to flow over you.  For me, the more I go to my consecrated place the sooner I hear from God.  Also for me, having my worship music playing softly in the background seems to prepare me to enter into his presence.

Story of Teddy

When I first began to go to my consecrated place I actually experienced what I will call a miracle in my own life. 

* I have never been an animal lover and really didn’t want them around me at all. We had dogs as our children grew up, but for me the further away the dog the better. 
One morning about 4 ½ years ago as I began my praise and worship in my consecrated place at the end of the sofa,  I got up and started to walk, the more I walked the more I found myself worshiping.  
Then I felt the Holy Spirit come over me and as I looked around I saw our large 100 lb. mixed breed Lab looking at me through the glass patio door.  By that time I was just blubbering from the presence of the Holy Spirit.
At that moment when I saw Teddy a love for that animal came over me that I had never felt for some humans, much less a dog.  I ran to that dog grabbed him up and began to hug him. I think Teddy was just as astonished as I was.  I looked around to make sure nobody else was watching me, wondering if I had lost my mind.

Let me tell you God is so good.  I didn’t know it at the time but Teddy was dying.  A few months later he did die with Congestive Heart Failure. God allowed me to experience a love for him in his last days that I had never felt before.  God changed me in an instant, and that change has carried over to this day.

My adult kids look at me and shake their heads in unbelief at the change God made in me. Lovell and I have a small Maltese named Buddy that we love dearly.  He has enriched my life greatly. 

I am so grateful for that day when I sat down with the Lord to spend some quiet time with him in my consecrated place. God not only changed my heart for animals he also gave me a softer heart for people.  He truly changed my heart.

There is one more place I call my quiet place and it is out side on my deck in my swing.  I am awed by God’s creation.  I have seen some of the most incredible sunsets you could ever want to see.  Just being quiet and letting God visit with me a few minutes while the sun is going down has been at times an awesome experience.

I have been a Christian for over 35 years.  I’ve seen a lot and experienced a lot, some good and some bad, and probably more than most.  But God still touches my heart in ways that cause me to weep in his presence. 

I have to be honest though and say I don’t always take the time to sit down with him.  Sometimes my quiet place is turning off all the noises in the house and going about my day thinking about Him, praying to Him, singing to Him and trying to leave my burdens at His feet. 

Jesus says, “Come away with me to a quiet place and get some rest.” His eyes and his heart will be there.

Father we all have busy lives that demand our thoughts and time.  Please, Lord cause us to come away with you to the quiet place and experience your presence and rest. 

Jackie

My Angel

My Angel

February 10, 2012

Again let me say we all have stories to tell and no one can tell them the way we can.  So here is another one of my attempts to glorify my God and Savior Jesus Christ. 

In 1985 after a 2 ½ year Bible Study with a precious woman of God and Prophet my faith was soaring to heights I had not known before.  And let me tell you, what I am about to write would never have happened otherwise. 

When the Bible Study ended and my Tuesdays and Wednesdays were free God began to stir something inside me.  My children were in junior high and high school and my days were long.  As I pondered what to do with my time I began to think about going to work, but I had no working skills that would bring in a decent salary.  Believe me it did not take long to figure that out. 

I began to lean toward a formal education but had no idea where to start or what I wanted to study.  I checked out cosmetology because my sister was in that field, but quickly realized I did not want to stand on my feet all day.  I looked at college but had always believed the lie of Satan that whispered in my ear for years that I was not smart enough to go to college.  But, as I said my faith was soaring and I decided to check out the local community college in Orange.

When I decided to take the plunge (in spite of my low SAT score) into the realm of higher education I really needed a word from the Lord.  I prayed and asked God to confirm to me the direction I felt He was leading. He gave me a scripture that I leaned on for my entire college career. Philippians 4:13, “I can do everything through him who gives me strength”.

I did not know what I wanted to study but enrolled anyway and began with 2 classes in the spring regular semester of 1986.  Even with my elevated faith level I was still scared when I walked through those doors and sat down in my first college class... history

I was amazed because I felt like a dry sponge soaking up all the information that was presented and I loved every minute.  Even the homework that had me tied to my desk 2-4 hours after arriving home did not present a challenge to me, mainly because my husband and family were 100% supportive in my decision to return to school.

My history professor was like no other instructor I remembered in junior high or high school.  He opened up to me the world of history like a story unfolding before my very eyes.  To my amazement it was almost like hearing it for the first time.  I also enrolled into a sociology course that covered subjects I had not studied before. 

When the semester ended I knew Satan was a liar because I had finished the semester with an A and B.  I praised God for helping me every step of the way! Scripture states in, Matthew 19:26 “Jesus looked at them and said, “With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible.””.

I quickly began to think about summer school and enrolled in both summer sessions.  By fall I was ready to increase my load to 12 hours.  I still had no direction from God but I registered for basic classes that would take me in what ever direction I wanted to go.

I really do not want to appear vain but God is God, and He can move us in the direction He wants us to go even using our faults.  I was sitting in the student center having lunch when a group of nursing students walked through in their uniforms.  I thought to myself, “They really looked nice and professional in those uniforms, I wonder if I could be a nurse?”

I looked into the program and discovered registration occurred once a year.  The nursing school application prerequisite was two semesters of anatomy and physiology before I could submit an application. The grade had to be a B or better for both semesters, or the program would not even consider my application. 

Anatomy and Physiology is a difficult course of study in a regular semester but taken in the summer was very difficult! I virtually had to lock myself in my bedroom for the summer when I was not sitting in the classroom. The scripture God gave me was repeated in my prayers many times, and each time I reminded Him it was because of Him I was in this mess. But, He was faithful to see me through that summer and I passed with a B.   I was able to submit my application to the nursing program.

That year the program looked at 150 applicants with 61 being approved; I was in the 61 approved.  I really felt I had some direction from God as I began the nursing classes.

Little did I know at the time but the nursing program is one of the hardest programs at Lamar University in Beaumont.  My excitement about my future career as a nurse was soon put on the back burner as I delved into the study of nursing.  In the second semester of the study we learned pharmacology and with that we had to calculate the administration of medications.

            Oh, did I forget to mention I am horrible in math and that I have what is called by some a “math block”.  I was terrified because if the pharmacology part of the program was failed a student failed the entire program and would have to begin again.  Talk about pressure!  As the class progressed I continued to claim the scripture God gave me from the beginning.  “I can do all things through Christ, Lord I know your word is true and I stand on it now, in Jesus name.”  The first test had to be passed with an 80, the second with an 85, the next with a 90 and the next with a 95.

The thing is….. If a nurse can’t calculate medications do you really want that nurse taking care of you?  Yeah……not me either. 

Most of my classes were morning and as I drove to Beaumont I prayed most of the way reminding God He didn’t guide me to this place to fail.  I reminded Him of the scripture and told Him,” if I ever needed Him it was now.  I just can’t fail Lord, I just can’t, and I need you now.”

As I sat in class with only days before my first test and possible end of my short career as a nursing student a young Hispanic woman sat down beside me.  I was on the aisle seat in a graduated seating level.  I can remember this as if it happened yesterday.  She said, “You look like you are having trouble.”  I said, Yes I am! I just can’t get this and I don’t know what I’m going to do.”

She said to me, “Let me show you another way to calculate these equations and get the same answer.”  It was as if a light was turned on in my brain and I understood what she was showing me.  I could do the problems and get the same answer as the instructor.  It was a miracle!   I took the test days later and passed. I also passed all the other tests including the calculations presented in different scenarios for the remainder of courses.

The funny thing is, I did not ever see that young woman again! I am convinced to this day and get chills when I say this, but God sent an angel to me in response to His word. 

In Numbers 23:19 scripture states, ^“19 God is not human, that he should lie, not a human being, that he should change his mind. Does he speak and then not act? Does he promise and not fulfill”?  

I graduated from college with my RN nursing degree and passed the state board test.  God guided my every career step from then until I retired from my position as Center Director/Administrator of The Endoscopy Center of Southeast Texas in Beaumont Texas.

Let me say in my humble opinion those SAT scores are no indication of what a student is capable of achieving.  

In Jeremiah 29:11 scripture states, ¹¹ For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. ¹² Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. ¹³ You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart”.

God is so good!  When you hear see me speak of what God has done for me or even read what I post on my Facebook about how awesome God is, you will know I mean what I say. What he did for me he will do for you.  All he requires from you is that you give your heart to Him and walk according to his word. 

All you need to do is ask Jesus to forgive you of your sins and ask that He come into your heart and be Lord of your life.  He will and with that, “therefore there is now no condemnation for those that are in Christ Jesus”, Romans 8:1.  He loves you more than you can possibly know.

Jackie